Tuesday, August 24, 2010

A Little Help Here?

Many years ago, a single male math professor was hired by the college. Upon his arrival, a cabal formed to get him married off to an acceptable young lady. He was introduced around to the available female employees of the college, and he lit, fortunately, upon a girl in the library with whom he got on like the proverbial house on fire. I was at their silver anniversary party a few years ago...he's still a math professor, and she still works in the library. He comes over to have lunch and play Spades with her every day. They have a daughter and by all accounts, a happy and very companionable marriage.

The bachelors are thin on the ground these days, though. When I was hired, I was about a year away from ending my engagement. I was still stubbornly clinging to the thin shreds of the relationship when 9/11 hit. I'd just endured an emotionally trying tour of the British Isles with my then-fiance' and a group of the community college system's students. As a faculty member, I was thoroughly mortified by his behavior toward me, and within a couple of months, I was simply too exhausted from keeping up appearances to continue.

Over the ensuing years, I've dated a little. I've had a few relationships that lasted a handful of months to years. In the end, however, I'm moderately independent, in addition to being a little too credentialed, overweight, and a bit unusual in my tastes and hobbies. It makes me a bit of a hard sell on dating websites...and I'm just not the kind to get out and meet people. Sure, I can go to band boosters and hang out back home until I'm blue in the face, but I'm just not a people-y type person. It gets a little lonely sometimes.

Maybe it would've all been simpler if the Ad-Hoc Marry-off the Single Faculty Committee had still been operational about the time my engagement collapsed, or maybe not. I'm not entirely sure I want to get married, but I do know that I hate being alone. Is that entirely insane? Sometimes I wonder...

2 comments:

Farmchick said...

I know you always wonder how things would be if it were the opposite of your current situation. I do the same sometimes and I think it is just a normal thing to wonder.

AiredaleGirl said...

I know I'm in reasonable company, since your brother-in-law and two of my other friends from our class have also not married. Did you know he was the first boy who ever asked me to go steady (even though it was possible that he was put up to it as a joke)? It may be some kind of jinx-by-association that rubbed off on him from me...